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Monday, October 23, 2006

Parenting...

Potty training sucks. Back when I was a little kid, parents sort of forced their kids to be potty trained. Today, you are supposed to let your kid lead the situation and not force it. So now that Sophia is three, I keep hoping that she will find an interest in being potty trained, but until today, this has not been the case. Today she actually told me that she wanted to go to the potty (YEAH, SOPHIA). I thought she was joking, but she really did go. I don't know what made the difference, but I am so thankful. I really was hoping that she would be potty trained by the time the new baby arrives, but with only about five weeks left, I don't really think that this will happen.

It is really hard to get inside the head of a three year old. Sophia is like Dr. Jekyll and Mr.Hyde most days. She is so sweet and kind one minute and the next she is hiting, biting and screaming at you. I always try to calm her down when this happens thinking that if I can just get her attention, I can help her with why she is so upset. I often wonder if I ever take care of these sort of situations properly. Sometimes when this happens in public, I know that people think she is a brat and maybe I seem like a softy, but I was never a parent before Sophia, so I have to wing it. I wish that I could be a fly on the wall in other people's houses to see how they deal with this sort of thing. I am sure that other parents have the same issues, but I don't get to see it. If I did, it would help me feel like I was not such a failure all of the time.

I wonder if I will be able to handle both a new baby and Sophia, but I guess like all parents with more than one kid before me, I will figure it out. I know it will be very hard in the first few months. I am hoping that Sophia will be a little mommy to the new baby. I hope that I have shown her how to be a good mommy. I will keep you guys posted. Please pray for my sanity.

Take it easy!!!

8 Comments:

Blogger Mimi said...

I am not sure about the whole letting your kid lead. Only because I know of too many parents who have 4 and 5 year olds in diapers. And talking to parents who did it the old way seem to have had the kids trained sooner. Not that anyway is wrong. But I think parenting books etc are sometimes too lenient nowadays. I wish the best! Good luck!

9:24 PM  
Blogger ChristyTN said...

It's hard to find a balance between being too strict and too lenient with kids. Actually, I think I have a problem with being too lenient and may spoil MG a little. We have been just so happy to have kids after trying for so long that we tend to be that way.

It's been a battle getting MG interested in potty training too, although she has been "trying" every day. She really complains about how her diapers feel, so I keep telling her that panties feel much better. She has also started telling us every time she goes in her diaper or when she is about to go, so she recognizes the feeling.

It was embarrassing but funny the other day when she made the following announcement in the restaurant at the top of her lungs "I got a big poop! I got a big crap! I crap on Grover!" (She was wearing a Sesame Street diaper)

11:43 PM  
Blogger Kat Campbell said...

Ah, Linda, you aren't a failure,you're the mother of a three year old! The terrible twos are nothing compared to the threes. I know this isn't trendy, but like Mimi, I've seen the results of kids being allowed to lead. They're kids! They don't know what's best for them yet. My five were gently encouraged (bribed occasionally with ruffled panties and floating cheerios for the boy) beginning at about 2 1/2. Later we learned that kids aren't capable of "holding it" as young as 2, but by 3 I think you can expect her to use the potty. There are two tricks to parenting that never let me down: a schedule and consistency in all things. I can't wait to hear what the new baby is!

4:35 PM  
Blogger The Management said...

I wanna post. But I don't know anything (nor do I) about potty training... and I can't even remotely imagine the anxiety of having be responsible for one child much less two.


Instead, I will comment on the Baby meter at the top of the site... achemm...

"Yeah, your almost at Red Threat Level!"

Otter

12:41 PM  
Blogger Ivey Elizabeth Sirmans said...

Take a little advice here. Do what YOU think is best. Toss the books!!!!! You're just overthinking it. How many kids go to school not potty-trained... See? This is what I call 'Parent Pressure'. We listen to everyone else, comparing each other's kids, most of the time leaning toward perfection when taling about our own. My oldest is 3, my middle is 2, and my youngest is 6 months. The great thing, once the oldest IS potty-trained, she will teach the rest. Your job is done :)
Gwen

6:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can I tell you something, Linda? I was a COMPLETE BRAT when I was kid. No kind words about it. Except when I was ridiculously nice, of course.

It gets better. :)

12:47 PM  
Blogger Linda said...

Mimi - I have tried to just make her sit on the potty, but it usually ends up with tears, so I take a step back. Sometimes a small bribe helps, but I don't always think that this is a good practice either. I know that she understands the concept, but would much rather be doing something fun!


Christy - There is NO doubt that Sophia is spoiled. She is a monster of our own creation (well, her Grandparents can take some of the credit for that, too)! Sophia never complains about how diapers feel. They could be full of god knows what and she just does not want to be changed. It is very frustrating. Kids are so honest, they have no problems announcing their bodily functions to the rest of the world.

Kat - I guess I just get paranoid that I am going to mess her up for life. You hear all of this crap about what is right and what is wrong and you never really know what to do. It is funny, she was doing great towards the end of summer and was going most of the time and then she lost her pacifier (which I had been wanting to get rid of for a while). I think she sort of got mad about this. I have also read that late in a pregnancy older kids sort of go off track sometimes, so I did not know what to do. Like I said to Christy, I know she understands the concept. My aunt is pretty horrified that by the age of three, an otherwise brilliant child is not potty trained. Part of my problem also is that I am not schedule oriented. No matter how hard I try, I can't grasp the concept. When I worked it was easy, because my job dictated my schedule, somewhat. That has gotten a bit better recently, but I know that that is an area where I need to work.

Otter - Sorry about the potty talk. I know that it can not be very interesting to you. Just take it as a training lesson for later in life. Yeah, I am ready to pop. That little guy at the top is actually a bit off, too, because that is for my actual due date which is 12/9, but my scheduled due date is 11/28, which means, I actually only have 29 days. BTW, it was great seeing you on Friday. I love to watch you and Bob go at it. I am with you on surrounding myself with smart people I figure I can always learn something new from them.

Gwen - I guess peer pressure does not stop with the teen years. I do feel pressure about this stuff, soemtimes. I hope that you are right about the older trainer the younger. I can only hope that Sophia will have things together by then. I am keep Ivey (and everybody else) in my thoughts! Thanks for taking the time to commment, I know that you are extremely busy right now!

Ryan - You a brat, hard to believe. HA HA HA! I actually think that there are still some bratty qualities about you, but that is why I love to have you around. You make me smile in ways that sometimes only a small child can. This is a wonderful quality to have, if you ask me!!! I am sure that you will be one of those guys who age very gracefully, because of this!

8:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aww! That's a nice thing to say. :p

1:05 PM  

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