Happy Days...

I had a few minutes to myself this morning before Sophia woke up. I decided to watch a bit of TV while eating a bowl of cereal. I was flipping through the channels and happened upon "TV Land" playing an episode of "Happy Days." When I was younger I really seemed to enjoy this show, but when I watch it now I have to think about how cheesy of a show it really was.

That leads me to one of my pet peeves about the show and it's spinoff "Joanie Loves Chachi." In the episode I watched today, Joanie was deciding to move back home and leave Chachi in Chicago. First of all, I never could understand what Chachi ever saw in Joanie. I thought she was a dog then and still do. If I were him, I would have said, "see ya later, there are better fish in the sea." Did the directors of the show think that people were so clueless as to think that somebody like Chachi would ever have a thing for a Joanie type? I don't know.

YUCK!

Bad...

I am one of those parents that gets really embarrassed by my child being bad any place in public. While I know that kids will be kids, I find it completely unacceptable when a parent shows that they are in no way going to try to make their kid behave.

I like my neighbor across the street and Sophia loves her kids especially the oldest one. They stopped by today and asked Sophia and I to go to lunch with them. This was fine, because Sophia had not seen the kids in a few weeks. So we went to our local Pizza Hut and the waitress sat us in a corner booth. I had Sophia secured in a high chair, the youngest of my neighbors kids was also in a high chair and the oldest was seated between her mother and myself. The first thing that I thought was inappropriate was that the oldest child removed her shorts that were on top of her swimsuit. She did this after she was told by her mother not to. Then she proceeds to climb up on this platform that is in the corner behind the booth we are sitting in. Her mother's phone rang (another thing I never do is answer a phone in a restaurant)and as soon as she saw that her mom was having a conversation she started to ask me for things that her mother had already vetoed. I was amazed at the way the mom was able to ignore every one of the things that this kid had done. I would have been horrified and walked out after discreetly paying my bill.

Towards the end of lunch Sophia started doing this thing where she lets out very shrill short bursts of screaming. I immediately started to cover her mouth and when she really did not want to let up, I decided it was time to go. I use this same practice in a store and even in church sometimes.

Maybe I am a stickler, maybe I should relax a bit, but I have to think that nobody in the restaurant wants to hear a loud child or see a child misbehaving and not being corrected. I am not sure. I just never want to have the feeling that others are thinking that I have no control over my kid or that my kid is spoiled brat.

Maybe I am getting old, but it seems to me that kids today have more than kids of my generation ever had and with that also comes a lack of any kind of discipline. And I am not talking about beating kids, I am talking about letting your kid know what they have done is wrong and promptly removing them from the situation so that they have a chance to think about what they did and why it was wrong. Is our society so lax that future generations of children will be much worse than the ones today? I can only hope that there are other parents feeling like me that are looking for ways to improve the future for our kids.

Fathers...

As I am sure you know today is Father's Day. Happy Father's Day if you are a father!

Today made me think about what it means to be a father. Until I met Bob I had very few examples of what a good father is. My birth father has never been present in my life, my first step-father was abusive and my second step-father was clueless about what it meant to be a father.

My Grandfather was a good man. He put up with crap from everybody. He always made time for me, for which I will be eternally grateful. He was a simple man, but gave of himself when he could. I have many wonderful memories of him. Bob's grandfather is also a great man. Even though he may disagree with you at times, he always seems willing to listen to your point of view. He enjoys his family and lights up when he sees any of his grandchildren including his great-grandchildren, like Sophia.

I would have to say that at this point in my life, Bob's father is the closest thing to a true father that I have ever had. I remember getting yelled at before Bob and I were married. He treated me no different than Bob and still doesn't to this day. He has given me fatherly advice when there was nobody else there to offer it. He has always been willing to lend a helping hand. Most of all, he has been a really terrific grandfather to Sophia. It is like he was waiting for her all of his life. It is to him that I offer up my best Father's Day wishes and thank him for being there.

Bob is also a wonderful father to Sophia. I hope that she knows how lucky she is. He works so that I can stay home to be with her, even though I know there are many days when he wishes I was the one working and he was the one staying home. I know that he will always be a great father. He has so much knowledge to share and I know that he will be glad when she has a thing or two to teach him. I love to watch him with her and am glad that he is her father.

So what does being a good father mean to me? First, a father is somebody who is there to share in the good times and the bad. He is there teach you right from wrong and to tell you about the world. He is there to listen and maybe learn a thing or two. A father treats you like you are special and that there is nobody else like you in the world. A father makes sacrifices. A good father is thankful for his family.

Thanks to those men who have what it takes to be a great father!!!

Play...

I am never really ready to admit that Sophia is no longer a baby. I still call her baby when I talk to her. I guess just like all parents say about their children, she will always be my baby.

A sure sign of her maturing is the fact that two or three times now we have had the little girl across the street knock on the door and say, "Can Sophia come out to play?" It hard for me to think about her wanting to play on her own without me. I know that it is a natural thing to want to be away from your parents, but I am not sure if I am going to like it.

For now I can rely on the fact that this is a few years away (hopefully). For now I will just enjoy watching her interact with the neighborhood kids. Hopefully, she will be a good friend and playmate to those around her.

This past weekend we took Sophia on her first camping trip. We all had fun. She went hiking, climbed some small rocks and looked for crayfish in a stream with Bob. Other than the fact it was hot and humid, it was a weekend to remember. There is nothing better than waking up and hearing the birds sing and smelling a campfire. I can not wait to take her again.

Bob and I have been camping together since before we were married. The first time I went camping was with him. I am glad that we both enjoy it and am also glad to be sharing our experiences with Sophia. I hope that she will understand that the world is a beautiful place and that she knows that she is part steward in preserving such beauty.

Ups and downs...

Sophia is 20 months old. Did you know that the average 20 month old can learn a new word every 90 minutes. I think Sophia is doing a great job at learning new things. It is hard for me to explain, but I get a real sense of pride when somebody comments on her vocabulary. I think she is a genius, but that might be because I am her mother.

I think that I had noted before that she had started swimming lessons. The first two classes she did great, but the last two have been horrible. She cries and when I put her on the side of the pool to jump in, she lifts her feet so they are not touching. I guess she figures if her feet are in the air, she will not have to jump. That is a pretty good assessment. I am not sure what is going on. Recently (over the last month), she has been getting more and more nervous about new people. This is very normal and I think that this may be why she is freaking out during her lessons. Oh well, she only has three more classes to go. I think she will be much happier when she can swim at her grandparents house with no strangers in site.

This weekend we are taking Sophia on her first camping trip. It should be an adventure. We also are taking our dog, Katie, along. So we will have opposite ends of the spectrum with us, a fast 20 month old and a very slow 15 year old dog. Actually, I think it will be great for both of them. Bob and I have been camping since we started dating 15 years ago. We both love it and hope that Sopia will love it too!

Parenthood it seems is full of ups and downs. My happiest times are when Sophia is accomplishing things or when she is just having fun. There is no greater joy than the laughter of a child, especially when the child is your own. We have started a new thing with Sophia. At night after she has her bath, we sit with her on our bed and read several books. This seems to be a great way for her to unwind and a very nice time for us to spend with her. This ultimately leads to jumping on the bed and this can be quite scary, because you are terrified that she will fall off (which she did at her grandparents the other day). There is so much personally invested in her that even the smallest tumble can make a me a nervous wreck. I watch her run and hope that she does not fall. Sometimes she does and I do my best to teach her to dust herself off and get back out there to play, even though my heart is saying "that's enough let's go in before you get hurt worse."

The last two years have been a time for learning for me. It is hard for me to find the line between Sophia's life and my own. I try very hard not to be one of those moms who only talks about her kid (this site excluded), but sometimes that is very hard. It is funny how relationships with other adults change after a baby arrives, especially when most of your friends and acquaintances have no children. I have a harder time in social situations than I ever have. I think that this is because, my life seems rather boring to others or maybe I just think that it does. This is very hard for me, because I have always been very talkative and outgoing. I guess it just takes time to adjust, but I hope that I adjust sometime soon, as I am feeling left behind at times. I am sure that every parent goes through this, so I will wait it out. And if you should see my "self" out there, tell "me" to come home, I am looking for her.